“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” – Marcel Proust
Babe, Hubby, Father of my children,
Can I be honest with you?
Details, when it comes to parenting, aren’t your forte.
You know that phrase, “The devil is in the details?” Well I’m almost certain that a woman wrote it. More specifically, a wife and mother wrote it.
Sometimes I notice the details that you don’t when it comes to parenting.
I notice that our daughter’s nails need to be trimmed, and our son is in desperate need of a haircut, and nine times out of ten I’m the one to notice that Peyton has a dirty diaper.
Sometimes I wonder if I wasn’t around if you would continue to dress Parker in size 4T clothing even though he’s 5 ½ years old.
I wonder if you would take the time to learn how to do Peyton’s hair if I wasn’t here to do it every day, and God knows the children’s ears would never be cleaned out if I wasn’t around.
But do you know what babe?
When I really open my eyes to all of the things you do, I notice that a lot of times we are a well-oiled machine.
Often times, while I’m busy prepping dinner for the kids, you are busy taking out the trash.
While I’m busy changing a diaper, you are busy taking care of yard work.
While I’m busy writing this right now, you are busy giving Parker a bath.
In many ways, we are a team, working towards the end goal of lovingly raising two children and running a household as smoothly as possible, no easy feat in my humble opinion.
Not to mention that there are many little things you do that I’m sure you wish I would actively notice, such as washing the cars, getting oil changes, and paying the mortgage, to name a few.
The thing is babe, these little things pale in comparison to the big things you do.
Like how even when you’re tired after a long day of work you still choose to play catch with Parker when you get home, and how you rescheduled your dentist appointment so you could make it to his spring show at school.
I notice that it’s not out of obligation but out of choice that you snuggle and play with Peyton for 15 minutes every night before I put her to bed. I see the look of love on your face during these moments, and I have the same look of love while I watch you two. It’s contagious, this love thing.
You’re not perfect, babe. You lose your temper sometimes, just like I do.
But your heart only lets you take a couple of minutes before you apologize to Parker, and that part of the story shows me who you really are.
Sometimes in life we make the small things bigger than they are, and we make the big things smaller than they are. Perspective is about adjusting the lens in order to view things at their actual size. It’s about taking a step back to look at the bigger picture in order to see what truly matters.
What I see when I take a step back is a doting dad with unending love for his kids. I see children that adore their daddy and act as though they get to go to Disneyland every time you walk through the door.
What I see when I take a step back is that what matters the most has less to do with what you do as a father (though it’s a lot), and more to do with who you are as a father: kind, loving, hardworking, giving, supportive, and nurturing. The list goes on and on and this makes my heart swell with pride.
Parker is going to learn from you what it means to be a man, and Peyton is going to learn about the kind of man she wants to marry (no pressure), but I promise that you are nailing the job.
Who you are is love, and that’s really all you need to be in order to fulfill your duties as a role model.
If you ever have any doubts in your mind about it, remember this.
I asked Parker, “Why do you love your daddy?”
He answered me, “Because he loves me back.”
Simple truth, straight from the source.
Happy Father’s Day, babe.